“I QUIT”


When is it OK to QUIT something?

Many cultures frown on people who give up on things. But is it ever good for everyone, involved with the one who quits? Whether it’s a job, a relationship or a dream?

No consideration about anyone’s vices is required, as quitting these is absolutely fine and healthy. Problems and bewilderment comes in life when it’s just a normal and natural situation. Society takes quitters as failures and losers, the people who give up, have no confidence and determination in themselves. But this isn’t the case always.

It commonly happens when people aren’t happy with their jobs. They keep thinking they should quit, but find themselves unable to make the decision. (that brings to my mind, another idea for a blog post: How do you decide, how to decide?). Life’s too short to be miserable and to make everyone around you miserable. You have to think of your physical, emotional, and financial well-being and not care if you’re branded a quitter.

In a relationship, there is no point in taking it along, if you two are not compatible, or share physically or emotionally abused relation. A time comes when people feel it as a burden, and there is no going back to happier part again, then it could be the right call to quit.

A dream could be broken due to countless circumstances. You may be no longer the person you believed yourself to be. The destiny may not be necessarily the same as you envisioned. That does not make you a loser. It happens in life.Quit when your heart tells you it’s time. It’s not a defeat. In fact, you’ll soon realize you did yourself a favor.

When is it OK to quit something?
I say, “As soon as you find yourself asking that question.”

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119 responses to ““I QUIT”

  1. Perhaps… perhaps it is a bit soon? maybe the tunnel ends at the next turn? Maybe being persistent is all that is needed? After all, life meanders… you might never know.

    ababout to tu

    • “MAYBE” – this says it all.
      if one can really sustain till that moment, that’s surely a better option!
      but that could be “too soon” for the one on the other side of it.. and entirely opposite for the one going through it.

  2. It’s ok to quit when perhaps we have tried several approaches to overcome the problems but to no avail.
    A quitter is a loser when they refuse to take it as a lesson and improvise in their next chapter of life.

  3. yup… it is good to quit something which our mind and heart don’t allow to do…always do what ur mind and heart really want to do..never think about society… just think yourself and be selfish at that point….

  4. its good to analyze oneself weather the path one has chosen is for him or not… its better to have this realization asap so that one can decide weather to quit or to sustain n try harder to achieve..although its always difficult to take a decision… but who knows you better than yourself…at last all that matters is ones satisfaction with life, work or relationship… if u r satisfied u r a winner…

  5. I agree with you, that it’s alright to quit something. We only have so much time in this world, and like you’ve said: things change, people change. So, if we change somewhere along the way and begin to waste time, energy, et cetera, we’re doing a kindness to ourselves and everyone involved by spending our time more wisely with something else. Good thoughts!

  6. Perhaps thats what many people go through and rather would not admit they too quit or willing to quit something or the other in their lives.
    Anyway , nice post 🙂

  7. I quit my marriage. And i didn’t think i’d be saying this, but i am soooooooo relieved. I will never know if i quit too soon. I will never know if ‘the tunnel would have ended at the next turn’… But stats said the relationship would never improve… And what i do know is i couldn’t go on…

    • glad to know you’re relieved. that’s what the ultimate achievement should be, to be happy and satisfied. Too soon/late shouldn’t pose a problem as long as you’re going well with the decision. Good luck 🙂

      • I agree that if the result of a decision to quit is satisfaction,relief,elation or whatever then you have probably chosen the correct path. However, “maybe” and “but what if” are also very powerful as well. Taking both of these points into consideration, I strongly prefer to base decisions on statistics, but so often the heart which is usually powered by hope tends to ignore many indicators that the time has come to discontinue a journey. I myself have almost a psychotic need for perfection and I don’t know that I have the ability to truly “quit” any challenge I have accepted, which has hindered me greatly in my life. Tapish, I do like and appreciate your outlook on this though. I always like to read others insights on areas that I know I have a personal defect in. Thanks man!

        • Wow.. you covered real good aspects in your comment. It knocked my mind on every line, especially the ‘heart n hope’ thing. that’s too good on your part to be highly determined and achieve what you want to, Hats Off to you!
          Regarding insights, I share the same opinion as you. Knowing others’ insights in such matters effects your thinking for good.
          Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts! 🙂

          • No thank you for introducing the topic and concept into my train of thought tonight. It is exactly the subject matter I needed to reflect on and actually write about. I really look forward to reading more of your blog in the future. I just received confirmation that I will have access to my notebook over the next month so hopefully I will be able to still communicate with the “outside” world lol. Again, Thanks!

  8. At the very moment when your mind and heart exclaims ” I’M DONE with all i could do and i am not rewarded with any positive outputs after all my efforts in favor of it…”.
    Thanks for having a look at my post..and liking it.

  9. “you have no control over what others feel about you”. other people labeling you a quitter falls under that saying, to me. we put a lot of pressure on ourselves. a saying I have recently become aware of is “be kind for everyone is fighting a difficult battle.” and thanks for liking my blog.

  10. very well written purest form of gold..
    When relationships drag you down, weigh on your shoulder and on your mind, don’t let u be, and when you are sure you have tried your best, you should quit with your head held high. But unfortunately, its very complex sometimes and a lot of dimensions are to be considered.

    People talk, no matter what. So quitting, be it a job, a relation or anything, is not a sign of a loser. Its says that you dare to say ‘no’.

    • Haha.. you’re still down there with the meaning 😀
      I so agree that we have to consider so many dimensions. But somehow we do search for the ones which go with our decision. It’s like we make the decision but couldn’t find out enough points in its support.
      Thank you very much for the appreciation 🙂

  11. Pingback: Stranger quote « 4livinglife·

  12. Well said, Tapish!
    I especially like the last line, When is it OK to quit something?
    I say, “As soon as you find yourself asking that question.”
    I don’t think quitting anything at any point is wrong or something that puts one under a ‘not-so-good-attitude’ mark. It’s just a perception. I think doing something well is more important than not doing it well, and still continuing because it is not nice to quit!
    I had written a story long time ago on my blog which is on the similar lines of this. It is not exactly about quitting but in a way it is.
    Check this out when you are free:
    http://lopascribes.wordpress.com/2010/09/22/the-buddha-speaks/

  13. I feel sticking in just for the sake of sticking in, produces stagnation…which is not how we are supposed to be experiencing life. But of course we also have to be aware of not becoming a grasshopper, jumping from one thing to the next, when we might learn valuable lessons from enduring…so I guess…follow the heart, it rarely goes wrong in the long run.

  14. Hi! A really great post – I like it! In your lifetime you maybe ask often yourself: should I quit? I think so too, it is because we all make our experiences in order to grow with them. We all constantly get some new insights, new interests, new dreams, new visions. We can feel in deep inside of us that something has been changed. We gain new views for some things in our life. This is fully normal.

    I completely agree with your words:
    “When is it OK to quit something?
    I say, “As soon as you find yourself asking that question.” ”
    and:
    “Quit when your heart tells you it’s time”

    Yes, that is exactly!
    Cheers!

    • thanks for the lovely comment. you are right talking about that point, we do change our minds along with time due to the various factors as you listed.
      thanks again 🙂

  15. Very true. I think in relationships there is a big stigma attached to people (especially women) who walk away from a relationship (especially when there are children involved). But I know so many unhappy women who are plugging away, year after year, in relationships with neglectful, bullying and even abusive men, partly out of fear of being alone, but partly out of fear of looking like they ‘didn’t try hard enough’. Then it’s only when her man dumps her that she is forced to go it alone – this time as a victim instead of a quitter. Why can’t be just leave the labels alone?!

    • yes that’s what i want to say, we should take the decisions considering our state of mind and what her heart wants. We need to be happy at the first place. There’s no point in living like a victim. Take your decision with your head and heart composed.

  16. How nice to stumble on your Blog and read your reflective and considered thoughts. You left me debating with myself which is always a good sign that the article is stimulating

  17. In September my Meta yoU School of Mastery will be offering a course entitled Breaking the Corporate Mindset, a spiritual perspective from someone who did. The presenter, Chris Dunn, went from “when is it okay to quit” to “I know I am my own authority and here is something I have always wanted to do”. How he did it is the basis for the course. Stay tuned!

  18. Thanks for stopping by and liking! Sometimes, you have to set fire to the field so something new has room to grow. I am always reminded of that old country song, “Take this job and shove it”. But this applies to relationships, addictions, something good that is now pedestrian and no longer bringing that intense frisson of joy or something that you just don’t like anymore. You gotta do what you gotta do. 🙂

  19. Nice post!! I’l say quitting is another word for chucking out what’s not necessary, worthy or not enjoyable!! If fearing being called a quitter makes me stick on, then I guess its just not worth it..
    I’l stick on if it gives me the kick to live, it makes me feel loved, it helps me to look at things in perspective…
    Else, I love being a quitter.. It allows me to try different things.. I used to think I’m inconsistent, now I know its just that I dunno what I really want.. So il be lucky if I get to change careers and try my hand at different things in life.. Someday I’l figure out what I want & stick on with it..
    Else, I’l quit and the journey will beautifully continue..

    Thanks for the post 🙂

    Shraddha

  20. Quitting the right things, at the right times and in the right way is important. Pruning helps a plant reach its potential. Quitting can be like pruning and can be beneficial to our personal growth.
    Thanks for the great post!
    Thanks, as well, for stopping by to read and like my latest blog!

  21. Glad you liked my post Tapish….your perspective on quitting is a relief to a lot of people who have quit from difficult relationships in life.

    Sometimes…you try too long and too hard…and a time comes when you just know its time..to QUIT!!

    Warm Regards
    Seema Shenoy

  22. I agree there is no shame in quitting but at the same time quitting too soon is also not advisable. Difficult relationships for instance ! if the problem is with a girl friend/ boy friend quitting is an easy option but if its a spouse you got to put in that extra effort. One needs to ask oneself whether one has truly done one’s best. at the same time one needs to know when they have done too much. Fine line!!! 🙂

  23. “When is it OK to quit something?
    I say, “As soon as you find yourself asking that question.”

    I’m sorry to disagree with you in your own blog, but this is too important a thing to let pass. If my wife and I had done as you suggest, we would not have found ways and tools to make our marriage work when we ran into the inevitable marital and life challenges. We woulld not have been able to stay married for 33 years, or be able to honestly say that we are happy in our home, marriage, and friendship. I’m not suggesting that people who are miserable together for a long time should alwasy stay married–on that we agree–just that quitting as soon as you begin to ask yourself the question you pose may very well rob you and others from the opportunity to have long-term marital happiness or any long-term committed relationship. And that would be tragic indeed if long-term happiness with the same person is what you wanted.

    With respect,

    Russ

    • Thanks for sharing your views. I absolutely agree with your points. Marriage is of course the biggest thing here we can talk about, and all your points hold true in this context. Everyone can have a different limit of acceptance or tolerance to these matters ( in general sense), but marriage has to be given a lot more time than the other issues I discussed. God bless you both, Russ!
      Cheers.

      And, there’s nothing wrong in disagreeing with someone’s views. After all, that’s what blogging is all about!

  24. Tapish, ahve you spoken to anybody about the jaipur meet. Should we put up a post about it. Maybe the wordpress people have a way of sending a message to all bloggers from Rajasthan! We need to work this out properly!

  25. I had to scroll down for a full minute to reach here and by the time I was here I was tired. The post i guess is shorter than the series of comments and I am just adding to its length. 🙂

    But, I have a precise question. I understand about the job thing, but when you are in a relationship, you may be ready to quit but the other person may not be. Makes the thing more complicated, isn’t it?

    • Hehe.. yes, it has been certainly the most discussed post on my blog 🙂
      and, now that’s the most discussed part of this post, RELATIONSHIPS!! you’ve just brought up a different prospect altogether, and I totally understand that part. I gave it a thought, and yes, that really can create a mess around. I guess the solution can be working things out 😛
      Thanks for sharing your views, Jyoti.

      • Really? I mean of all these people who read and commented and liked your post, they never asked you this question? Strange!
        So, that means I am really good at asking (apparently) intelligent questions, even my profs think so ( no, I’m not blowing my trumpet :P, I am only bad at answering)

        Anyway getting back to the post, yes, it gets complicated and “working things out” is such a vague idea, we don’t know what exactly will work. therefore, you see, any generalization on human nature/relationship sounds hollow beyond a point.

        And you don’t need to thank me for sharing my view. I was actually looking for some insight from you on this. Personal motive, you see. 😉

        • Ya they mostly talked about the marriage part.
          Haha.. yes you can say that for now 🙂
          I know we don’t know it as such, but what other options can you try in such cases; if someone really wants not to put an end, the matter has to be sorted in some way or the other.

  26. A wise man suggest when started a new job, give it a year and keep note of what needs changing for you to get or stay happy. Then work another year trying to become satisfied with the job. If that does not happen, start looking for another job, but plan to luse what you have learned in the job your are leaving.

    what I learned when I left a job, never, ever, resign in person before submitting your retirement letter. I did once and was told I was already fired. That could not have happened so easily if I had written the letter. He might have have thought twice about having to falsify a letter.

    Stay strong there are a lot of vipers out there.

    Kat

    • Oops! I never knew such things could happen in real.
      Thanks for sharing your views. You gave me an important lesson. I’m yet to start with my first job and will definitely keep it my mind.
      Thanks again.
      Regards.

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